When I can't think no more, and the thoughts crowd my head, I let them out, one at a time, and after sorting them, put them back together again…in order to begin entangling another web!


Laboriously, I peeled. Patiently, I extracted the lovely red seeds of the Pomegranates. My sis-in-law exclaimed in sympathy – that’s why it’s called “not a bachelor’s fruit”! Bananas are bachelor’s fruits. No fuss, no mess, no hard work.

I have been divorced for the last seven years and, for all practical matters, I consider myself single.

So, the comment “not a bachelor’s fruit” didn’t make much sense to me.

Then, I thought about it and realized that bachelors are considered lazy, carefree, free of responsibilities, basically god-for-nothing. And with true Indian sacrificing spirit, we feel that whoever is good, must be a hard-working ass, would have been tortured. will drink but only to drown their sorrows; they wouldn’t indulge in drunken revelry like the bachelors and girls on their night outs!

And because Indians feel that being tortured is so essential for the goodness of soul, marriage is considered necessary, bachelorhood is frowned upon!

And then I wonder if marriage is so good, and teaches one responsibility, and if married people are right, they’re supposed to eat right, at home, daal-roti, not the fast food and beers like bachelors indulge in all the time! So, why is it that before marriage these men have almost concave like stomachs, the only protrusions being these cute little abs. But after marriage, the same stomach acquires the convex shape! The straight, flat line becomes a nice round! Married people eat right. Right? They have the pomegranates that their wives have lovingly peeled and cleaned for them. The bachelor is the one who rushed out of the door, late for work, with a banana and orange in hand. So, what happened to the projected results of eating the right foods?

Bachelorhood has “convenience” as the strongest argument for it. Marriages are considered the inconvenient, but necessary paths to acquire legal heirs.

So, why is it that very soon the honeymoon turns into a never-ending period of convenience? Marriage ceases to be the union of two lovers, it becomes the union of a handyman, chauffeur, gofer, maid, cook, and baby-sitter!

Bachelor roommates share everything equally, even respect, irrespective of their individual salaries. It doesn’t matter how much you make. Your share of the rent, grocery bills, in fact, every expense that you were supposed to share, you need to pay, on time.

But this practical sharing of duties and expenses, which keeps fights at the minimum, and partnerships to last the maximum, is so unemotional. Isn’t  it? where’s the love? Where’s the care? Let’s face it. You might be living like a family, but you aren’t a family.

But the husband-wife union is so glorified! The union of the souls, of two families coming together, of two beings united not just for this life, but forever, all the lives that you will ever live! Here’s the emotional bond that defies every practical sense one might believe any kind of sharing ever requires – one person will earn, one person will spend! One person will give rise to the idea of a child, the other will bring the child into this world, and raise the child to be a human being from whom they can command their old-age benefits!

And, my rant shall continue…later…




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